What Wedding Planning Looks Like Now with our Engaged Staff

Wedding planning (unfortunately) looks a little different this season… with five engaged staff members at Brides of Houston, we are all too familiar with the changes COVID-19 has brought to the wedding planning process. We’ve asked our engaged staff members to weigh in on what the wedding planning process looks like now for them. Read on for their advice on staying positive, being productive while planning from home and making those difficult changes.

Rachel Luetkemeyer 

• Graphic Designer
• Wedding date: originally set for March 21, 2020 // rescheduled for August 8, 2020

What events have you had to postpone or cancel?

When word spread that the NBA season had ended after a Jazz player (who was in Oklahoma City for a game) tested positive, I had a gut feeling that my wedding, scheduled for the next weekend, would need to be rescheduled. I just knew that things would only be getting worse, and I felt like at least a week and a half in advance was enough time to let all of my guests know not to travel.

I called my amazing wedding planner, Blair Sims, who had jokingly sent a text that morning saying, “We’re getting you married next week no matter what Corona says!” I said, as much as I would like that to be true, what would postponing the wedding look like? I just couldn’t imagine getting married without all of my friends and family there, while at the same time, I would NEVER want anyone to get sick at my wedding. I said the only sickness I wanted going around my wedding was boogie fever! She was quick to comfort me and tell me that she would do everything she could to help. I started by calling my mom, who then contacted our church and our venue to see if they would be okay with moving it. She also checked on dates available for both, and we found August 8th to be available! 

I called Blair and asked her to help me contact my vendors to see if they had August 8th available. As I called each of my vendors, my voice cracked and tears started flowing as I had to say the words, “We are going to have postpone the wedding.” Being the amazing people that they are, each and every one comforted me and told me they would do whatever they could to help. By some sort of miracle, EVERY one of my vendors had August 8th available and were incredibly helpful to shift my contracts to the new date. I know that I am beyond lucky to have found a new date that would work for all of my vendors, as so many brides and vendors are scrambling to reschedule now. 

It is such a tough time, not only on engaged couples, but on all the amazing wedding vendors who have worked so hard behind the scenes for months leading up to these events, only to have them all delayed. While it is heartbreaking all around, it has been amazing to see so many couples and the wedding industry coming together to help each other out to prove that weddings are truly about one thing: LOVE. Not only the love of happy couples, but the love of all the families and friends that come together to celebrate; the LOVE wedding vendors have for what they do, whether it’s capturing these special events in photos and video, or filling the receptions with the most beautiful flowers, making the most delicious cake, setting the scene with luxe table linens, or getting all the guests on the dance floor with the perfect song. Weddings are a celebration of LOVE. And hopefully once this is all over, we will all be able to go back to celebrating together!

My mom asked if I wanted to go ahead and get married on our original date, and then just have a reception down the road. I said no. I know people say that at the end of the day, a wedding is really just about you and your fiancé and the love you have for each other. This is true, but I feel like a wedding is much bigger than just two people – it’s about bringing a new family together. It’s about all the people in your lives who have shaped you into the person that you are, and in turn that have been a part of your love story in a way. I just couldn’t imagine getting married without everyone I loved there to witness that special moment. I also think a wedding is your one chance to have everyone you love, from different parts of your life, together in one room. It is a truly special moment, and I can’t imagine giving that up. I would happily marry my fiancé any day, but I’m looking forward to spending our wedding day with everyone we love.

Luckily, the only thing that has really had to change is the date. My amazing vendors were able to make the new date work, so we really are incredibly lucky. I’m currently preparing a digital save the date, but plan on sending out another printed invitation. I am planning on doing a digital RSVP through my wedding website this go round – it was so tough getting all of those reply cards back in the mail the first time. 

Also, I have 500 koozies and 500 cups with the wrong date printed on them, but I guess it will be an inside joke! I also had planned to have my dance floor filled with Irish/St. Patrick’s day themed flair (my fiancé’s name is Patrick, and our original date was just days after the holiday)… and I even went so far as to order custom shamrock hats with our names on them! So I guess it will all just represent how LUCKY we are that we are celebrating together! Haha!

A few days after cancelling, I felt relief knowing that the decision had been made and that a new plan was in motion. The days leading up to my postponing, I had been nervously watching the news every day and staying up all night reading every news article. I was in a constant state of panic. I would have been such a wreck if we had gone through with the wedding. I know we made the right decision, and take so much comfort in knowing that we will have our day eventually.

I don’t know what I would have done without my amazing family through this all. My parents were supportive and comforting when I called in tears. They told me they wanted me to have the wedding I’ve always dreamed of, and that we would make that happen no matter when! 

My incredible friends sent amazing flowers letting me know they were thinking of me. On our wedding day, more flowers arrived from my future mother-in-law that matched our wedding palette perfectly. It was such a sweet gesture.

The day we were supposed to get married, I was very sad, but also so thankful for the support of all of my family and friends. I put on my veil from my bachelorette party and made my fiancé pose with me toasting with Corona beers! I posted it to social media, and received so many sweet messages from people all over, even people I hadn’t seen in years! It was so sweet to have so many people thinking of me and supporting us. 

I have NOT been productive in keeping up my pre-wedding workouts, so that is something I will need to jump back on before August arrives.

What’s amazing is that everything was already planned and ready to go, so now there isn’t much left to do! It’s kind of nice feeling like it’s all set – just have to wait for the day! I do have to update programs and invitations, but those are both such small steps in the grand scheme of wedding planning! 

Madison Doornbos

• Office Manager / Social Coordinator
• Wedding date: May 16, 2020

What events have you had to postpone or cancel?

I was lucky enough to have family friends host a shower for me the week before the official CDC recommendations were released. Looking back, it was perfect timing that I was able to see so many people I loved before this indefinite period of isolation! There was a second shower scheduled for April 26th that had to be cancelled, which was especially disappointing, given it was a family event with most of my extended family whom I adore.

How have your wedding plans changed?

We made the decision to postpone our reception, but still get married on our original date. It feels so good to know exactly what our plan is, rather than to wait and call it at the last minute. 

For the reception, we’re trying to stick to the original plan as much as possible, using the same vendor team, bridal party attire and special detailing. I’ve been thinking of ways to create a vibe that makes guests feel as if they’ve entered our reception space after attending our ceremony just before. At the same time, we want people to feel more relaxed and casual. Coming up with new ideas has been fun!

Our wedding ceremony guests will include my fiancé’s parents, my parents and each of our siblings. It will be a very intimate ceremony size compared to our original 350 guest-count projection! At this time, my florist will still be able to create an installment for the ceremony and a bouquet for me to carry. Afterward, we’ll all have a home cooked meal together and maybe even swim in the pool! It may actually be better than what we had originally planned. We definitely won’t forget it!

How are you feeling during this time?

I’ve been trying not to get too attached to my plans or ideas with everything changing so fast. “Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on Earth,” Colossians 3:2. The only thing that really matters to me is marrying Chase and starting our life together! Unless our health prevents us from doing so (or the courthouse closes – LOL), nothing will stop us from getting married!

What has been your biggest concern while planning during COVID-19?

My biggest concern is that our new reception date will still be in danger of getting cancelled due to regulations and laws. 

How have you found positivity during this time?

Finding gratefulness and contentedness in the new normal. We’re all living day-by-day now! Taking a walk with my family in the evenings, cooking a new recipe, starting a project and FaceTiming loved ones are all things I look forward to that normally wouldn’t have received so much hype. 

How have you been able to stay productive in your wedding planning?

I think most of us have more time in our day now, so I’ve been finding it much easier to hop on a quick call or send out emails. My planner is really the one to credit for everything that’s getting done – she has been working so hard!

photo: Mark Boatright Photo

Carsyn Abrams

• Content Creator
• Wedding date: October 24, 2020

What events have you had to postpone or cancel?

So far, I haven’t had to postpone anything except bridesmaids dress shopping with my girls. Praying that I won’t have to move my bachelorette party and showers in August! We are very hopeful this will all be over by October! 

How have your wedding plans changed?

So far we are relatively unaffected, but we are closely monitoring everything just in case the guest count restrictions are still in place in October.  

How are you feeling during this time?

I am feeling more stress as a wedding vendor than a bride (I also photograph weddings professionally). It breaks my heart to see so many couples loose all of the work they have put in over the past year. As a bride, I’m trying to focus on the positive and remember that so much can change in six months! 

What has been your biggest concern while planning during COVID-19?

My biggest concern is that my guests will feel unsafe at our wedding. My top priority is making sure our guests feel cared for and aren’t spending the evening wondering if they will get sick after our big day. 

How have you found positivity during this time?

I have had so much time to work on the small wedding details that I otherwise would have put off for months! I’ve found the perfect getting ready robes, my dream shoes, and am in the final stages of designing my invitation suite. There really is beauty in all this down time and having the time to put toward fun things like online shopping.

How have you been able to stay productive in your wedding planning?

I have made weekly to-do lists, not daily lists. I’m giving myself lots of grace during this season and know that it’s okay if I don’t accomplish everything in one day. I can make up for those less productive days on days that I have the energy to do lots at once. We are all learning during this time, so try different things and figure out what works for you! Time blocking, lists and accountability partners are all great things to start with! 

photo: Melanie Foster Photography

Hanna Smith

• Wedding Editorial Director
• Wedding date: November 21, 2020

What events have you had to postpone or cancel?

With my wedding being in the late fall, we really didn’t have anything major planned just yet. However we have paused all talk of planning showers until all of this passes, so basically as of now, we are at a stand-still with all wedding events. I was planning to go bridesmaid dress shopping in April with all of my girls, which won’t be happening in light of all going on, so now I’m just looking online and setting virtual meetings with dress shops. But thanks to technology, I’ll be able to have everyone on the call and it can still be fun – just different than I originally pictured! 

How have your wedding plans changed?

So far, nothing has changed! Fingers crossed it stays that way. 

How are you feeling during this time?

I do have to admit that I feel a little overwhelmed, but I’m just trying to trust that everything will work out! It is a little scary planning a large event in a time like this and just hoping that life will be back to normal. Because I’m so type A, I hate feeling like I’m at a standstill in the process – I just want to be able to go on meetings with vendors and keep the ball rolling with the planning process, so that’s definitely been a change, I’m just having to sit back and be patient, but I keep reminding myself that my wedding is still pretty far away and hopefully all of this will be over by then. 

What has been your biggest concern while planning during COVID-19?

I have been planning to get married in the fall from the beginning, but now that COVID-19 is a factor, it stresses me out that so many weddings are being rescheduled for the fall, and it makes me fearful that vendors that I am interested will be too booked to accommodate my wedding on top of their rescheduled weddings. I get really torn and feel selfish whenever I hope that I can get my top vendors booked, because I also want everyone who’s having to reschedule to have a more than perfect day because of everything they’ve been through, but selfishly I want my day to be just as I envisioned as well. It’s been hard being in the beginning stages of wedding planning during this time because I feel like everyone, vendors included, don’t know what to expect and how to move forward.

How have you found positivity during this time?

My fiancé typically travels a lot and is gone way more often than not, so it’s actually been really nice to have some time for him to be home. We’ve had more face-to-face time together in the last few weeks than we have in a long, long time! It’s also been nice to be forced to slow down the wedding planning process because we’ve had some time to just enjoy being engaged and soak it all in together.

How have you been able to stay productive in your wedding planning?

I’ve used this time at home to collect addresses for our Save the Dates, which has not only been productive, but it’s been nice to have an excuse to catch up with and check on so many of our loved ones during this crazy time! I’ve also been spending a lot of time working on our wedding website, designing Save the Dates, looking online for bridesmaid dresses, and pinning a lot of ideas and inspo to Pinterest! This has also been a good time to do some research on bands for our wedding reception, so we’ve spent a lot of time on YouTube watching performances to help us make our decision. 

photo: Emily Nicole Photo

Randi Foreman

• Production Coordinator for Brides of North Texas
• Wedding date: June 5, 2021

What events have you had to postpone or cancel?

Since I just recently got engaged (February 2020), I have only done a little here and there to begin planning for the big day! So far I’ve had to postpone our engagement party and engagement photo session that were happening in March and April. I’m truly thankful that out of my events, these are the only ones getting postponed. My heart goes out to the brides that are having to postpone so much more! 

How have your wedding plans changed?

Our current wedding plans haven’t changed! We set the date for June 5, 2021.

How are you feeling during this time?

I’m feeling hopeful. I’m hopeful we will come out of this soon. I’m also just wanting to give current brides a huge hug during this time. I truly cannot imagine what it feels like to have to postpone, but I’m just hopeful that their new date will be such a blessing. I hope during this time people will continue to celebrate those brides until their new date to keep the excitement going. It’s hard when there is no knowing when this is all going to end. The unknown is what’s stressful and scary, but I have major faith that we will come out of this soon! 

What has been your biggest concern while planning during COVID-19?

My biggest concern has been even though our wedding is in summer of 2021, I have been nervous that vendors are going to book really fast due to all of the postponing of 2020 weddings. Again, the unknown of it all is scary. Who’s to say when this is going to end. Who’s to say it won’t effect my wedding next year. 

How have you found positivity during this time?

I’ve just been constantly reminding myself that I still have over a year and actually letting myself be excited about every thing we’ve decided upon thus far. Anything can change in a month, two months or even a year. So just keeping the hope and knowing that I’m not alone in this! 

How have you been able to stay productive in your wedding planning?

I’ve been working on/focusing on booking the things that don’t require an in-person appointment. Luckily, we already had our venue picked out before the stay at home orders were in place, but I’ve since booked our photographer, videographer and planner! All have been so great chatting with over the phone or email. Sadly, I have to wait to do certain things like try on dresses, taste cakes and find catering, but all in all, I think focusing on the things that don’t require an in-person meeting have helped me be very productive! It’s definitely helped the planning process to move forward still. 

photo: Madison Katlin Photography

Are you also a #coronabride? You are not alone in this craziness! We hope we can help with these bits of advice!